I typed this list in my cellphone while having my morning time with the Lord at the Ebenezer yesterday (misplaced my ball pen). Thinking of what He's been teaching me so far before the clock ticks away. I know I should not .take this issue lightly . I think I must come to it this time prepared and not being caught by the moment. I am convinced that preparation is the key to lifelong relationship. I am convinced that the next biggest decision I'll make after giving my life to Jesus and accepting Him as my Lord and Savior, is who am I going to marry and how would that marriage look like? Do I sound so advance or do I just have to be intentional about it today to prepare me for tomorrow? I have my own share fair of mistakes that I wish it didn't happen. I don't think this is the perfect list. This is just my some convictions I learned in GOD's training room.HOW DO I KNOW I'M READY TO CONSIDER A RELATIONSHIP WITH MARRIAGE IN MIND?
1. When I'm wholly and fully content with my love and relationship with God.
- My sense of security and assurance must come from God. The overflow of that relationship will be an opportunity to show the love I received from God to her. People often come to a relationship hoping that the empty vacuum in their hearts will be filled by the person only to end up frustrated if unmet. Only God can satisfy all our desires to look for it in other people is a mistake.
Matthew 22: 37-38
Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
2. When I can do to all not only to one(her) what 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 says.
-Which means when I learn how to be patient, kind, not rude, etc.to all as I prepare to be that person to her. It's easier to be kind when you are courting someone. But in reality, are you really that person? It is more of a lifestyle than showmanship. The bible taught us not how to find the right person but how can we be the right person. Am I the person whom I am looking for is looking for? Preparation trumps promises all the time! So help me God!
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
3. When I can discipline myself ,abstained from physical intimacy.
- This is one of my major indicator. If a relationship easily slides to physical intimacy it means its not a God-honoring relationship. It has to stop immediately!
Romans 12: 1
1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.
4. When I can truly know and have practiced what it means to die to one's self.
- I desire to enter a relationship with the desire and intention to serve than to be served, to give than to benefit, to show than to be withhold.And this starts today, in my single years I must learn to be of service to my family, church, friends and community. I believe that's how I prepare myself to better serve my own family and wife in the future.
Ephesians 5:25
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her...
5. When I can be financially sustainable to bring the relationship to marriage.
- This doesn't mean that I have to be a millionaire first. It means that I have enough means to provide for a family in the future. My vision is not unique. I want to have my own house and lot and family car.Have enough income to provide for daily needs.And a margin for leisure and bonding.And most importantly when I can discipline myself today how to handle the little money I have.
1 Timothy 5: 8
Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
6. When I can have a vision for what a Christ-centered home is.
- A home where love is found. A home every member is valued. A home where quality time is spent. A home that is a shelter and refuge. A home where support is always available. A home communication is open. A home where kind words are spoken. A home where Christ is the head.The list could go on.
Psalm 127:1
“Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain."
7. When I can find a woman who is also moving into the same conviction and direction God set for me in the first six of this list.
- Why marry someone whom you can't get along with?
Philippians 2:2
2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.
P.S. This is just my list.Maybe you can agree with some. And others you don't. Its the Lord's personal dealing with you as you consider the decision when you are ready to enter in a relationship with marriage in mind.
